“Ghost, a happy wife is a happy life, that's why we let our wives push us around like your granny pushes you around in your wheelchair”—A Troll, Radio Graffiti, Episode 237
“I'M NOT A GODDAMN CRIPPLE! Jesus Christ, man. I'M NOT A DAMN CRIPPLE AND THAT WAS- THAT WAS RIDICULOUS! THAT WAS SCREWED UP, MAN! True Handicapped Radio you sons of bitches.”—Ghost's reaction to "True Cripple Radio", Radio Graffiti, Episode 255
Crippled Ghost is one of the longest-running, frequently-occurring running troll gags on TCR and TGS. After doing a voice comparison during one of his True Capitalist Radio broadcasts during which he facetiously stated that he was in a wheelchair, Ghost was trolled by by various Twitter Names and Radio Graffiti callers claiming that he was crippled. Ghost has since adamantly denied being a cripple, even going as far as to tap dance ('doing folklórico') during his broadcast to prove the trolls wrong. Referring to Ghost as a cripple and/or wheelchair user, or even referencing wheelchairs, has become a reliable way of enraging him despite its frequent repetition, easily driving him to cans.wav.
Around Capitalist Episode 234, Ghost used the phrase "I could be a cripple in a wheelchair" describing a hypothetical situation. The following episode, Twitter Shoutouts and Radio Graffiti were plagued with jokes about Ghost being in a wheelchair.
In late May 2016, trolls began combining cripple/wheelchair jokes with references to the Vietnam War, often implying that Ghost was paralyzed or lost his legs while fighting there. Splices and Twitter names on this subject, such as "Left Legs In Rice Paddies", are particularly potent rage fodder for Ghost. By late 2016-early 2017, people stopped trolling Ghost on this matter, only infrequently occurring. After the 2017 Break, trolls later began calling him bald and insinuating that he wears dentures (see below).
Following Ghost's debut on YouTube, wheelchair jokes once again became common with trolls routinely bombarding Ghost with various disability-themed TTSs, Media Shares, and $12 buckers. Examples include Hoverround commercials, commercials for catheters and stair-lifts, TV show or movie clips featuring wheelchair users, disabled men/women participating in extreme sports, and Source Film Maker animations of previous shows' splices. Submitting donations with this theme will usually result in Ghost angrily denying he is in a wheelchair.
Due to the higher-fidelity audio format on YouTube, Ghost's office chair can be heard frequently creaking during a broadcast. This occasionally prompts trolls to tell Ghost to "oil his wheelchair", or suggest that his wheelchair is buckling from the weight.
Minor variations/offshoots on the wheelchair gag exist:
- Bald Ghost - Trolls occasionally call Ghost bald, which he angrily denies.
- Catheter Ghost - A newer variation seen since The Ghost Show, following several instances of the "Catheter Cowboy" commercial being requested on Media Share. When Ghost announces he needs to "drain the main vein", trolls will occasionally insinuate that Ghost requires a catheter to urinate.
- Incontinent Ghost/Soiled Wheelchair - Also new to The Ghost Show and a variation of "Ghost Quotes". These are TTS's which usually start out with a quote of something Ghost said minutes prior, only for him to then interject that he has soiled his wheelchair and demanding Engineer clean him up.
- Dentures Ghost - Trolls occasionally have suggested Ghost wears dentures. This became a briefly-occurring gag around 2017, then made a resurgence on The Ghost Show. Dentures Ghost later resulted in an offshoot gag about Ghost losing his teeth to Meme Magic.