Insult carol
An insult carol is a song or poem sung by a caller - usually a poetic jerkdick - in order to troll Ghost. They can be an original song, but are more often parodies of an existing song. The troll Coodoo17 was an early adopter of this style, with the first entry on this list being played on many shows.
Hambone - Coodoo17
A parody of Tik Tok, by Ke$ha
Wake up in the morning next to Alex Jonesy Ghost waddles down the stairs and watches My Little Pony Once that's done, beats his son and listens to Howard Stern Gets the Engie in the Prius and finds a cross to burn I'm talkin' Knocking over mountains of cans, cans Yelling at all his fans, fans Bon Jovi's his favourite band, band I'm talkin' 26 bucks for a shirt, shirt Plus shipping that's gonna hurt, hurt Wallet's burning up like scorched earth... Hambone, getting owned, Ghost is forever alone A grinch, likes to lynch says it's easy as a cinch He's small, 3 foot tall, but it brings some epic lolz Lolololololollllll, lololololololllllll
Miller Time: The Ballad of Ghost - Coodoo17
A parody of Dynamite, by Taio Cruz
I came to shoot shoot shoot shoot All of these pearls to all these fruits fruits fruits fruits But you're all being Helen Keller deaf mutes mutes mutes mutes Y'all think yer so funny and cute cute cute cute Yeah yeah Because I'm out here every day But you jerks don't care anyway, yeah I throw my cans up in the air sometime Saying hambone, greasy hambone Y'all've ruined this Baller Friday of mine Saying hambone, greasy hambone And so I'll end the show End it on a dime Then go to sixth street 'Cuz it's Miller Time 'Cuz I run this town, and run it so sublime I'ma get messed up, 'cuz it's Miller Time I came to drink drink drink drink Everything but the kitchen sink sink sink sink Before I even have time to think think think think I'll punch that fruity lookin' chink chink chink chink Yeah yeah 'Cuz when I'm drunk I like to fight Any jerkdick who isn't white, yeah I throw my cans up in the air sometime Saying hambone, greasy hambone Y'all've ruined this Baller Friday of mine Saying hambone, greasy hambone And so I'll end the show End it on a dime Then go to sixth street 'Cuz it's Miller Time 'Cuz I run this town, and run it so sublime I'ma get messed up, 'cuz it's Miller Time I'm tired of you jerkdicks I don't even have to be here So get cancer of the prick I'm gonna down like 26 beers 'Cuz Miller Time's Ghost-tastic and Miller Time is my favorite time Yeah my favorite time I'm gonna throw my cans up in the air Cans up in the air Throw your cans up in the air <can solo> I throw my cans up in the air sometime Saying hambone, greasy hambone Y'all've ruined this Baller Friday of mine Saying hambone, greasy hambone And so I'll end the show End it on a dime Then go to sixth street 'Cuz it's Miller Time 'Cuz I run this town, and run it so sublime I'ma get messed up, 'cuz it's Miller Time
Right Wing Man (Fruitbowl Wednesday Anthem) - Coodoo17 Ft. Tubguy
A parody of Barbie Girl, by Aqua
"614, Radio Graffiti!" ("Ghost, let's go out to Sixth Street and fruit up the place!") "Hell yeah, that's what I'm talking about, baby!" I'm a right-wing man in a left-wing land Capitalizing, blood pressure's rising It's fruitbowl Wednesday, so let's dance the night away Time to get fruity like a wild jahooty (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) I'm a right-wing man in a left-wing land Capitalizing, blood pressure's rising It's fruitbowl Wednesday, so let's dance the night away Time to get fruity like a wild jahooty I'm a fat racist man, out here doing what I can Order me a round of appletinis (See you there, wheelchair, see you roll in my way There's no way you're not getting in my tub) My mellow can't be harshed Make it rain here on Sixth Street I'm a right-wing man in a left-wing land Capitalizing, blood pressure's rising It's fruitbowl Wednesday, so let's dance the night away Time to get fruity like a wild jahooty (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Ha ha ha, woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Woo! Woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Ha ha ha, woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Woo! Woo! I tie my neckerchief, I adjust my hat See another man's ass, yeah, I want some of that (Can't deny, you pass by, you make me say "Oh my!" Have some soap, then a grope, yeah, it's bath time) My mellow can't be harshed Make it rain here on Sixth Street My mellow can't be harshed Make it rain here on Sixth Street (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Ha ha ha, woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Woo! Woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Ha ha ha, woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Woo! Woo! I'm a right-wing man in a left-wing land Capitalizing, blood pressure's rising It's fruitbowl Wednesday, so let's dance the night away Time to get fruity like a wild jahooty I'm a right-wing man in a left-wing land Capitalizing, blood pressure's rising It's fruitbowl Wednesday, so let's dance the night away Time to get fruity like a wild jahooty (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Ha ha ha, woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Woo! Woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Ha ha ha, woo! (Come on Ghostler, let's get closer) Woo! Woo! "Man, I gotta tell you, Tub Guy, I'm having a great time" ("Well Ghost, I noticed you dropped the soap! Oh my!") "Uh oh!"
How the Capitalist Stole Christmas - BlueChameleon
A parody of How the Grinch stole Christmas, by Dr. Seuss
Full lyrics here
Capitalist Episode 218 - 512
A parody of My Name is Jonas by Weezer
My name is Ghostler I'm a Jewish Hambone My Granny's six feet under And my Father was an asshole My wife is a whore And so was my mom And my son likes-
Capitalist Episode 226 - Texas Troll
A parody of It's Tricky, by Run-D.M.C.
Ghost is a Jewish hambone Butt-plug-up-the-asshole-loving racist Racist, racist racist racist racist His wife is a dirty dishrag whore And his son likes My Little Pony Pony, Pony Pony Pony Pony Sheriff Mack's a retard, so vote for Lamar Smith And while you're at it, vote for-
Capitalist Episode 247 - Cave Johnson/Cr1tikal Sans
A parody of Careless Whisper, by George Michael
Time will not favor The crippled hambone They call Ghostler With Teutonic Plague [When?] Ghostler says He took comfort in his pain(?) Plagues will never bring good He's never gonna dance again Hoverrounds have got no rhythm Rolling never simulates The joy of walking [straight?] (Engineer mumbling in the background) Should've known better than to trust the Plague The Engineer I tried to warn him But he's never gonna dance again Corrupted like a Bur-eau-crat
Capitalist Episode 260 - A Real Black Guy (Elfoxoloco)
A parody of Short People, by Randy Newman
Little Ghostler's got no reason Little [???] got no reason to live Teeny tiny twerp, writes in shorthand Shorter than a smurf, a midget minivan He's little bar with little matted fur(?) He likes to take a bunch of dicks up inside of his butt - Always Tweeting all them itty-bitty lies And sucking all them dicks of big black sweaty guys - So I Don't want no short midget He takes his bubble baths in a bidet He's too short to call a bigot He's weak He needs a booster seat- <later the same show, under the People's Republic of China> Oompa-loompa boy, very jew-faced He'll deep-throat a goy, until he's blue-faced Oh I'm not saying he'll put a single drop to waste He's such a whore for the taste, ohhh He [???] like an itty-bitty shrimp and prays For the man mayonnaise
Capitalist Episode 301 - Anonymous
A parody of Trap Queen, by Fetty Wap
Taller than a gnome Weighs 300 pounds, he's a freaking hambone Eating sticks of butter from his trailer park home Talks about the markets, wishes he was Alex Jones Wears a tinfoil hat, he's got an extra chromosome Talking to Teutonic when he is a fruitbowl Has no life, he just runs this dumb show Beats the Engineer for not smoking his pole Bought a can of beer, got his DNA stole Takes his EBT-
Capitalist Episode 304 - Anonymous
A parody of September, by Earth Wind & Fire
Do you remember When Ghost didn't [act?] like a Klan member And his waistline was still sort of slender And he didn't chase the blacks away? His cans were ringing And his penis wasn't always shrinking As he snorted the lines, remember Now the trolls took his breath away (Come on, his penis was only two inches to begin with) Ba-de-ya, say do you remember Ba-de-ya, trolling in September Ba-de-ya, never was a cloudy day (His tinfoil hat protects him from HAARP) Ba-de-ya, say do you remember Ba-de-ya-
Capitalist Episode 360 - MrTamsy
A parody of Photograph, by Nickelback
Look at this autograph, it was signed by some fruity-ass. He hosts a 2-bit radio show, while he humps his body pillow. He just moved to a new town, but now it's likely that he's gonna drown. His wife has given him the slip, so that she can go and get double dipped.... Every memory of sailing out the backdoor, got his nudies of hillary on the bedroom floor, it's time to say it, time to say it, HAMBONE, HAMBONE!
Capitalist Episode 384 - RationalRyan
A parody of Lets Fly a Kite, from Mary Poppins
And now, here's a song from everyone's favourite political bureaucrats, Hillary and Bill Clinton! Let's go fly a drone Down in San Antone Let's go fly a drone And stalk Adolf Ghostler Down in the Lone Star State Down where he'll meet his fate Oh, let's go fly a drone! When you launch the missile down there His life will end just right there You can dance on his corpse while Teutonic kills his dog While your hand's holding tight To the control of your drones Let's go fly a drone Down in San Antone Let's go fly a drone And stalk Adolf Ghostler Down in the Lone Star State Down where he'll meet his fate Oh, let's go fly a drone!
Capitalist Episode 518 - J-Man Capitalist
A parody of Joy to the World
Cans to the world, Roy Moore is done cause he diddled some kids... Roy Moore heads to molester hell Al Franken will be there as well but the others will not care all we'll do this season is share except for the Grinch called Tom Albin...
Other Examples